first screening

Jordy got a call yesterday from the local adoption social worker and we have an appointment for our first initial screening. She is going to send us an adoption package that we have to complete prior to our appointment next week. I think this is the part where we start deciding on things like the age, gender, race, etc. that we would accept. I think this will be really difficult because how can you say "yes we will accept a child who is 18 months but not 24 months" or something like that. Or even harder, how do you limit what kind disabilities you would accept. I don't know if I could... I think we have a lot of praying and talking to do about these decisions before we can make any. Your prayers would definately be appreciated!

waiting, wondering, and wishing

These past few months have been hard to say the least. With infertility comes a whole slew of emotions that can be difficult to sort through. After our intial excitement of wanting to start adoption RIGHT THIS SECOND we realized that we were not ready for it as there was to many medical unknowns for us at the time. Now, after getting some more medical answers we've started to look into the process again. We contacted the adoption support centre in Saskatoon and were mailed some information. After reading through the information we had to contact them again and request our second package. There was a workbook for each of us to fill out that did not have to be handed in or anything, just completed for our own information. After completing those we mailed in a simple questionnaire requesting to be referred to our local social services to officially begin the process.
We were mailed the work books a few months ago but because of everything that was going on and all the crazy emotional rollercoasters we did not mail the questionnaire in until last Thursday, August 29, 2013. Now all we do is wait I suppose!

exploring domestic adoption

Yesterday I was able to meet with a lady at Social Services who handles adoption in Saskatchewan. I found it to be extremely helpful and informative. Domestic adoption is something that we hadn't really thought about before as we assumed that if we adopted it would just always be from another country. The worker gave me a lot to think about and Jordy and I definately a lot to talk about! Is domestic adoption right for us? Either way I'm glad I got to talk to the worker since I think it is so important to explore ALL your options, or at least as many as you can!

an application for an application

This whole adoption thing is going to test my patience and perseverance in some serious ways I'm afraid. Today I mailed our written request for an introduction package from CAFAC (Canadian Advocate for the Adoption of Children). That's right, we have to apply to apply! According to their January newsletter, CAFAC is accepting new applications but they are only opening 5 new cases a month. I have no idea how many they receive on a monthly basis so I have no idea how long we will have to wait to receive our application. Weeks? Months? I have no idea.
Well, here's to hoping that our letter will make it to the top of the pile sooner rather than later!

i love you already

Dear baby,
Last night your dad and I talked and talked and talked about you, dreaming and making plans together. I love you so much and miss you like crazy and I haven't even met you yet! You have a place in our family already and we can't wait for you to come home and fill that empty spot. We even talked about the fact that maybe you  have a little sibling that needs to come home with us too...? This is going to be one long road that I'm sure will be filled with happiness, tears, frustration, sadness and more and more waiting. But baby I love you and you are SO worth every minute of this journey we'll take together!
Love,
mama

they lowered the age!!

We just went through a couple of weeks of mourning about something that I am sure I will share one day, but just not yet. While mourning never really ends, for now it has at least subsided in some ways.
Today was a happy day though as I randomly (is there really such a thing as random or a coincidence?) went on the international adoption website that lists each country and their adoption requirements. Before, almost every country had a minimum age for applicants to be 25 but today when I was looking at the Ethiopia page it said there was only an age minimum if you were applying as a single applicant! What the What?! I could not believe it!
In a way it makes me ashamed because I have been so mad at God for the past few weeks, but maybe this turn of events was His plan all along. The good thing is that I know God knows me and understands the emotions of grief, anger, saddness, and dispair so he doesn't hold it against me.
After reading this news I immediately called Jordy and told him and then phoned the person in Regina that handles international adoption. He wasn't there, but I left a message and hopefully we can set up a meeting with him right away to get started on our application.
Baby, we're coming for you!

the beginning

I was always interested in the idea of adopting and had always felt a little tug on my heart concerning it. One of my favorite memories is spending time at a few of the orphanages I had the chance to visit in Africa several years ago. I will never forget those kids and all the things they taught me. One thing I remember in particular was visiting the baby room for only a few short minutes and seeing the babies lined up against the walls around their room in car seats and nothing but silence. They were so serious and it broke my heart because all I wanted to do was hold them all and bring them home with me to love on.
Jordy and I have decided to pursue adoption and I know that this is going to be a long and hard road but so worth it. I believe that we have been called to adoption for this time.